Friday, May 3, 2013

Fat - the final frontier of acceptable humor

I am morbidly obese. That being said, I still find myself joking about other people's weight. Even though jokes poked at me (and those I poke at others) hurt. It seems that since this is something most over-weight people can change, it's a form of criticism that is okay. In this case, I know personally how hurtful it is and yet I let such comments pass (or even utter them myself).

Over the years I've tried to change. To at least keep such thoughts to myself when I see some huge person in skin-tight clothes or not even able to cover-up their rolls of fat. Even the word "fat" comes out as if it's some curse word, spit out like poison. And in the process, my own self-loathing is reinforced with each negative thought, word, or action.

The first step of course, is self-love. To forgive yourself for not being what others and even yourself believe to be the only way to be. Of course, this can apply to other issues besides being fat but that's my focus for the moment. I should also acknowledge when something is said by a friend that hurts me and definitely work harder on refraining from such hurtful statements myself!

Although I still tend to be pessimistic and find the "always cheerful" type of people to be annoying, there is a method to their way of thinking. And the thing about what annoys us in others is that it is often something we lack and our own lack is what really annoys us.

So the way to change is to emulate these cheerful folks even if what we say is not true and we don't believe it. You don't have to insist nothing is wrong in your world, just try a few positive affirmations to change something simple, like saying "I love myself.". Positive affirmations are a form of self-hypnosis that really can work to change your view of the world.

I had a friend once that was a channeler. The first time he spoke to me, he relayed a lot of information, all of which applied to my life though he knew little of me. I didn't really believe in such stuff but I did write it all down.

One of the things he told me to read was a book, "You Can Heal Your Life" by Louise L. Hay ( Though I haven't finished it yet, it is full of positive affirmations and a great reminder of how well this works.

I am also fortunate to have reconnected with a cousin of mine who is Spiritual, Wise, Kind, and very into these positive affirmations. She often sends me links to various techniques, meditations, music, and such that help me to re-focus my efforts when my own energy is waning.

The point here of course is to have a few positive folks in your life and try to minimize the negative ones. Unless of course, you enjoy that environment. Each one causes chemical reactions in the brain and some people get use to the feelings caused by negative or stressful situations and believe they need to maintain that feeling by remaining in bad situations.

If you want to make a change for the better, start within and love yourself. Look in a mirror at least once a day, smile at yourself, and say something positive even if you don't completely believe it. Bit by bit, you'll change the world. Working from within yourself and expanding out into the multiverse. We are each part of a wondrous whole and we each matter and have an impact on the world. Make it positive!


No comments:

Post a Comment