Sunday, February 13, 2011

Addiction, Responsibility and HOPE

From nicotine to alcohol to any substance or other addiction, we all have a personal responsibility to ourselves and those around us. Whether we are suffering from addiction, enabling someone's addiction, or helping in whatever way we see fit, we are involved and owe it to ourselves and others to own up to this.

My ex once stopped dealing Meth to someone about two weeks before they blew their brains out. My ex said if he didn't sell this person their drugs, someone else would. I explained that it would then be that new dealer's involvement, not his. My ex later thanked me for getting him out of the situation before our friend blew his brains out. He knew he still had a hand in it but his guilt was far less.

It's the same with bar tenders that give out drinks to people swaying in the wind, barely able to stand. By law, they can usually be held accountable for selling too many drinks to someone but drug dealers rarely worry about such things and don't see their hand in such matters (yes, I lump alcohol in with drugs). Most seem not to have a conscious.

And lately I am battling with nicotine in many places in my life. From the loss of my father to a brain tumor, my mother to both cancer and emphysema, and my sister to pneumonia and emphysema, all caused by smoking, this is a personal demon. Many in my family seem not to care or the addiction too strong to see these losses and their suffering and learn from them.

Now a good friend's Aunt is about to die from it and the old feelings stir. Fear, helplessness, anger, to name a few. I remember the coldness upon hearing of it. The tightening in my chest and the floor seeming to fall from beneath my feet. And the feelings of hope against all odds.

I handled each time differently and not always very well. I have and continue to face my own demons too and don't always succeed. I will say that there is ALWAYS hope. From beating your addiction to honoring those that have died as well as miracle cures, there is always hope and help.

So hang in there and try to see things differently. Instead of "why me", how about "what now"? What can you learn from others? What can you change? And you can change!

Change can be so transformative and usually possible if we just keep telling ourselves "I want change!". Even if we don't believe it. It's a kind of self-hypnosis or brain-washing. If you hear something long enough, you stop fighting it and start believing it.

Never give up hope, keep trying, and reach out when you need some help along the way.


1 comment:

  1. Very well put my friend!! I am an alcoholic and fight demons every day!! Notice I didn't say "recovering" alcoholic? I feel like, once an alcoholic, always an alcoholic". I have only recently been able to stop drinking and that's with the help and understanding of the love of my life!! It wasn't my family and my 14 year old was watching me commit suicide passively, all the while I'm telling her to live right and ...well, you know!!! There is Always HOPE!! Thanks for posting this!!!